Chasing Shadows | ✓

Chapter Five

THE SECOND I STEPPED INSIDE, I KNEW SOMETHING WAS WRONG.

The air around me clogged in my throat, choking me. My brain flooded with a million reasons not to go in; it screamed at me to turn around and run away, but where would I even go? Who was I without the support from my father? I wasn't known as Trevor, but as Hugh Jenkin's son. Who I was didn't matter to anyone, it was all about the image. We had to play the role of a perfect family outside when inside it was all rotten. And I was tired of it all. I didn't have the energy to care anymore, not when no-one cared about me.

When people looked at me, they didn't see me. I was nothing but a surname to them, someone they felt like they had to respect because of who my father was. My entire image was built around him and making him look good. I didn't matter to anyone anymore. Why did being alive feel like such a chore? Wasn't life supposed to be fun? That was what we were told, right? To make the most of it before it's over, that we only got one shot at it. But if these were supposed to be the best years of my life, I didn't want to stick around to see the rest anymore.

My nails were already bitten down to the quick but I nibbled at their frayed edges like a famished mouse. Each step forward released a creaking sound from the floorboards coupled with the quiet ticking of the clock. Cold sweat glistened on my brow but I quickly wiped it away when it began trailing down my face. The fear sat on me like a pillow over my mouth and nose; enough air let in, allowing my body to keep functioning but it was crippling all the same.

Through the closed door came raised voices. My hand rested on the door handle, pushing it down and creaking it open. I poked my head in to see my father and Victoria standing in the middle of the room, her head bent at an angle towards the floor. Even from here, I could see her ashen expression, her chin trembling like a small child. Her hands were clasped behind her back, and it reminded me of when I was a kid and I would get scolded for doing something wrong.

"Please. I don't want to talk to you when you're like this."

Her voice was a mere whisper and it wavered in the middle. There was no strength behind her words or eyes. She looked as though one touch and she would collapse to the ground. For a moment, I pitied her. She walked into this family, not knowing the kind of man she was marrying and now she was stuck, with no way out except death. As far as I knew, Victoria didn't have any family of her own. We were all she had. She should have had the chance to see what a true, loving family was like, but instead, she was stuck here with father and me.

Father jerked his head back and his nostrils flared, "Excuse me? It's your fault we're even in this mess in the first place!"

From here, I could see Victoria trying to blink back her tears, "It's not my fault they decided to back out of the deal Hugh!"

Father tossed his head back and roared out a sarcastic laugh. His shoulders shook with each chuckle, and Victoria's face grew tenser, if that was even possible. I could see her curling in on herself, trying to inch back and her gaze dropped to the ground in shame. A disgusting sneer formed on his face when he fixed his cold eyes on her and spat in her direction.

"You women, always crying stupid tears. Maybe if you had actually graduated from a decent college, I wouldn't have looked so stupid in front of everyone! Scratch that, maybe if you had a fucking family, I wouldn't have to teach you these things!"

His words hit her hard and my hand on the door knob tightened. My heart started to ache a little, and I wanted to storm in and tell my father to stop. I wanted to tell him he was going too far, and that she didn't deserve it. I wanted to throw something at him, maybe yell and scream. But I didn't. I stayed there, my breathing getting heavier and heavier, but too scared to face him.