Spade (MxM)

Chapter 153

Nathan

Sitting on the couch for the past hour and my mind has been blank, well not completely blank but what's the point?
I've tried calling Matteo, not that he didn't pick up, of course he picked up but what I heard was not what I had wanted to hear.

I know he already told me that he won't talk to Spade on my behalf and I totally understand him but I just wanted to try my luck one more time, at least before I give up.

But it's not that easy to give up, not when I still love Spade so much, I haven't even been able to reach out to my sister but I know my father won't do anything to her, not after I've done what he wanted me to do.

My hand move on it's own and landed on the gold piece Spade had given me a few weeks back, I fingered and caressed it, it felt like a long time ago that I was standing in the middle of his living room and he handed it to me.

It's the only thing if him that I have, and as selfish as it sounds, I don't think I want to give it back.
Him on the other hand wants nothing to do with me or anything that belongs to me.
He made that crystal clear when he sent Matteo to drop off my stuff from his house.

He meant it when he said he didn't want to see or talk to me, and I don't blame him, I betrayed him and I deserve whatever he was giving to me.

But I wished he'd just let me explain everything to him, maybe then he'd tell me how he got the recording, if it was from his uncle or my father, the second option is very unlikely to happen, since they're not on talking terms

I sighed out as I let my mind take me away from where I was sitting, into a whirlwind of thoughts.

Flashback

I laid back on the bed with my legs spread apart slightly as Spade had his head just above my center and on my torso, my hand buried deep into his hair as I weaved my fingers into it.

It felt very soft and comforting, almost as if I would fall asleep just playing with his hair, my other hand was on his chest as he kept kissing my fingers and using his fingers to trail line up and down my arm.
"Baby" Spade called and I just hummed, closing my eyes for a few seconds
"Do you want to get matching tattoos"?

That question quickly made me snap my eyes open as I frowned and looked down at Spade, my eyes moving to the bedside table to be sure he didn't smoke anything, because I never expected that question from him.

I looked back at him, he had craned his head to a left angle so he could look at me, I cocked my brows at him
"Matching tattoos"? I asked and he nodded "have you been smoking"? I asked and he just frowned before he chuckled, his chest vibrating and shaking my hand that was draped across his chest

"What do you mean have I been smoking"? He asked as he stopped chuckling but there was still a smile etched on his face

"I mean have you been smoking anything lately? What are you on about getting matching tattoos"? I ask, while he just turned around and resumed his former position on my torso, he shrugged

"I don't know, something we both will have on our skin, like your name on my arm and maybe my name on your cock" he muttered lowly at the end, causing my dick to jump, which made him chuckle because I'm sure he felt it

"You want to get my name tattooed on your arm and have me do the same"? I ask and he shrugs again, still trailing lines on my arm, I could feel it inside my bones as I resisted the urge to shudder at the sweet feeling.

"It's pretty cool, I mean I guess I like to try something like that" he muttered, making me further look at him quizzically

"Okay, you seem pretty thrilled about it, what happens when we... You know" I mutter, he just stops trailing his fingers on my arm and look at me briefly