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I made my way downstairs and went straight to the kitchen. It was empty as Nikolai has fired the entire household staff even the cleaners. That is why it was incredibly silent today. I reached for a glass from the kitchen cabinet and filled it with water. I drank the whole glass in one go and placed it on the countertop.
Thinking about if I should do what I was thinking of doing.
I thought I was past my reluctance when talking about my desires but apparently, I'm not. I heaved a sigh and went upstairs again, eyeing Nikolai's bedroom door I headed towards mine.
Not knowing what to do, I glanced at the nail polishes on my dresser. I sat on my bed and chose a bright red color, it made me feel bold and confident like I could just burst through his bedroom door and please him the way he did to me. I carefully put the red nail polish on my nails, the color resembled blood like the blood that gushed out of that man's body. I fanned my hands out while my nails dried, blowing on them until it's good enough, and then painted my toenails.
Nikolai's presence still lingered around me, even though he was not here in this room. I felt troubled and off-balance. After last night, all I can think about is him. I hope it's not weird.
Damn it! I will not be able to sleep like this.
This man had seen me naked, he did unspeakable things to me and gave me my first-ever orgasm and still, I hadn't seen him without a shirt. I wanted to be the best thing he'd ever had. I wanted him to want me, need me as much as I want him, as much as I need him.
Does he not like me?
An unsettling feeling crept up from the pit of my belly. The thought that he didn't find me as appealing as I found him gnawed at my heart.
I got up and stared at myself in the mirror.
Was I not pretty to him?
I blew out a frustrated breath and walked out of my room. I knew what I was going to do could easily backfire. He was working, tired and he was clear about not wanting me anywhere near him but right now, I didn't care. I stopped right outside his door and braced myself.
I softly turned the doorknob, I was surprised to find his room unlocked. I swallowed and stepped inside. My eyes darted all around the room in a second. His bedroom was as dark as him, the black and white contrasted perfectly all around the room. The furniture was squeaky clean and everything else was just immaculate.
The thing that attracted me the most was the king-sized bed with charcoal black blankets with loads of pillows over it and the smokey-colored bedspread brought a touch of elegance to his private space. A light that looked like a mini chandelier was mounted on the ceiling. A black armchair was placed in the corner, probably where Nikolai sat to brood over something.
Everything was there except for him.
Until my eyes landed on his back. He was out on the balcony that was separated by double floor-to-ceiling glass doors. The smoke had enveloped him, probably because he was smoking a cigar. Being on the other side of the house, his view is different than mine. Before him, were vast grasslands that overlooked a lake.
