{Alycia Debnam-Careyxyou} Home Behind the Desktop

23

That one's for Carla

Carla...

The blonde girl's words echoed in my head. How was she connected to my dad's girlfriend? My mind raced, trying to think of any distant family members or friends of Carla's that could make some sense of this. My brother and I were shut out of most of their social life when we lived together, and honestly, I was okay with that. They tended to spend most of their time with people who were similar to them anyway. 

Even when we did end up attending social gatherings with them, their friends hated us before they even met us. They told everyone we were terrible kids, and openly punished us in front of them to prove the point.

"See that family over there?" my Dad asked me, pointing to a a couple sitting at the picnic table across from us. I nodded my head, fiddling with my hands under the seat.

"They're just like us," he pointed out. I gulped, keeping my focus on the table below me. Out of the corner of my eye, I watched his face get closer to my ear. I held my breath, begging him in my mind to back away from me, but we wouldn't listen. "I don't know what you've been telling your mother," he hissed in my ear. "But Carla and I aren't the problem here. You are." He moved his hand to another couple, standing by the outdoor bar. "You think they don't give their kids a smack when they need it too?"

I pulled my eyes back to the table, shrugging my shoulders and begging this conversation to be over, but I wished for too much. His hand moved to my thigh, giving it a hard squeeze that nearly caused a yelp to leave my lips. He must have noticed because he pulled his face back to my ear, causing a shiver to run down my spine. "You say a word, and I will make it so that you'll never speak again.."

No.... NO

I jumped awake, sweat dripping down the back of my neck as I sat up straight on the couch. I pulled myself to my feet, pacing back and forth as my heart pounded in my chest. It was painful, a crushing weight digging deep into my body that tried to prevent my lungs from expanding. I couldn't breathe, my fingers were becoming numb as the rest of my body began to feel everything. Every hand that was placed where I didn't want it to be was back on top of me, pulling me back into the past.

I stumbled down the hall to the bathroom and bursted through the door, My nails dug into my skin, scratching and scratching at the hidden scars of hand prints that abused my body.

"Get off! Get off of me!"

There was a knock, "Y/n, what's going on? Are you alright?"

I fell forward, my numb hands pulling the shower curtain open and flicking on the water. I heard another knock at the door, but my mind blocked it out as I fell into the tub fully clothed, the ice-cold water hitting my body that I desperately brushed with my hands.

"Okay! I'm coming in!"

My breathing came out rapid as my cold hands gripped onto the sides of my head.

"Oh my god! Y/n?" the water shut off above me but my body kept rocking back and forth as my mind remained somewhere else. Warm hands found their way to my back, their heat radiating through my drenched shirt. "Y/n, baby. It's okay, look at me." Her hands moved to my face, cupping my cheeks and lifting my head up. My eyes met soft and worried green ones that rapidly looked between my eyes. "It's okay, baby. You're safe." Her gentle voice soaked through my ears, leaking through my walls of the past and making it to me.

"I-I'm sorry" I breathed out through my hyperventilating breaths and held out my hands. "I'm s-so sorry."

She shook her head at me, as a hurt look began to spread on her face. She reached behind her and grabbed a towel, opening it up toward me and wrapping it around my shivering body. "Come on, baby. I got you." Her arms stayed around me as we slowly stood up.