the only time i feel i might get better (is when we are together) - ziam

Thirty two ‎✧ ೃ༄

"If I call you.. Daddy sometime'.. that' 'kay?" He muttered shyly, bringing up his teddy to his face. His face bright pink. "Like you be my propa' 'giver? Not jus' Liam who looks afta' me?" Zayn knew that Liam still had a lot to learn but he also knew that Liam was the one for him, from the minute Liam first understood what age regression was, Zayn couldn't imagine anyone but him to fit this special role. Liam was the only person he was comfortable to regress with so it seemed like the only thing that made sense.

Liam watched the boy, how his face turned so questionable, innocent and full of curiosity for his response. "Um.. I mean...Your caregiver? That's a big question, Z."

"Please. I wan' it. Only you. No one else." He whispered, looking at Liam with pleading eyes.

"I... What if I mess up?" He whispered back, eyes connecting with Zayn's soft brown ones. Liam knew just how big a caregiver role was, how special being a little's Daddy could be. He knew how vulnerable Zayn's small space was and how emotional age regression could be for both parties on a spiritual level. He couldn't make any mistakes.

"I trust you." Zayn hummed, voice full of honesty and after everything he had been through in the past with Liam, he was still so sure of it. People change and the man standing in the kitchen before him was the solid proof of it. He wanted Liam to be his Daddy.

"I will be your Daddy." Liam said gently, voice full of warmth. There was no denying that he enjoyed saying that sentence out loud, knowing that he was signing up to care for the boy for many years to come. Knowing that Zayn was about to give him his all and reveal even deeper into a side he hadn't shared with anyone but himself. Caring was still very knew for Liam as a whole, considering he never really had anyone to care too much for as a child, it was a fresh feeling and it was one that he enjoyed. "I will be... your caregiver, not just Liam that looks after you."

"'Kay!" Zayn grinned and stood on the bed, watching Liam from afar, swaying back and fourth in excitement. "I see you, LiLi."

Liam watched him with concern covering his features, "And I see you, I don't think standing up on that bed is very safe."

"You take fun 'of everythin!" He whined, stomping his foot against the duvet which received a raise of the eyebrow in warning from Liam, Zayn couldn't help but get shy. "Listen.." he spoke softly, "it's for your safety."

"For safety." The little boy repeated and flopped down onto Liam's bed, sitting cross legged with his hands either side of himself. He watched the man, huffing and putting his hands onto his hips in a very sarcastic style. "I bored now. No wan watch Encanto...!"

"How about... We go shopping?" The man suggested, "I know I've ordered you a pacifier and a bottle online but we could maybe get you some toys or something... A jigsaw perhaps?"

"Um.. Um.." Zayn muttered, suddenly feeling anxious, "But Li... What 'f people judge?" The only people that knew of little space was Louis, Harry and Liam, he couldn't risk anyone else finding out - Telling Liam in the first place was a big worry but buying baby stuff in a place everyone could see? Now that felt like a nightmare.

"You really think I'd let them, sweetheart? Besides, if anyone asks.. We'll say it's for like, my little cousin or something. They're not to know. I've got you." He reassured, rubbing his side to show he was really there for the boy and not just saying it as a matter of fact. "Let's pack your puppy into a bag to bring with us."

"Puppy!" He giggled, mind instantly free from the past anxiety which Liam was incredibly grateful for as he wasn't entirely sure how he'd calm the lad down from an anxiety attack. His brain fully focused on the stuffed toy which he was now holding once more against his cheek, he was easy to distract. This was something Liam had to keep in mind. "Soft."

"Very." Liam smiled, grabbing a black A4 sized tote from the hangers by the door. "We'll put him in here and then we can get changed. I reckon he'll be quite comfy in this bag, what do you think?"

"Vewy comfy." He agreed, holding onto Liam for a split second as he got up. The man working on putting the teddy into the tote in a way that didn't squish and upset Zayn. "All cozy. Just like you were in my bed this morning when you came and joined me."

Zayn squealed, clapping his hands. "We had cuddles.. Daddy..!" He giggled to himself, eyes crinkling. The word Daddy was still foreign on his tongue, as well as it was to Liam's ears but to them both, the word created a warm feeling in their stomachs. A feeling that felt safe, like home. It felt natural. "We very much did, now would you like me to choose you an outfit out for the day or do you think you can do that yourself?"

"LiLi choose." The boy smiled, picking up the tote and waving at the teddy as though it was going to respond to him. "He is so cute in here."

"He's very cute.. Just like a little someone else I know." He teased, making Zayn blush. The man got up and took a peek through Zayn's wardrobe before settling on a matching black velvet tracksuit, it was something that was quick, comfy and easy for Zayn to change into. (It reminded him of Juicy Couture but he knew that wasn't something a student on a budget like their own could afford.) It didn't require much effort and would probably help them both out, "how's this?"

"Aw'some!" He cheered, sitting the tote down gently so that he didn't 'hurt' the dog stuffy. "Comfy, pleas' I haf."

"Good manners. You may have." He laughed, handing the tracksuit over to Zayn who got changed into it (in a very messy manner.) Liam himself put on some shorts with a tight fitting shirt, pairing it with a pair of Adidas sneakers, whereas Zayn opted for some boots that were incredibly hard to put on while big, let alone little. With a sigh, Liam helped him out. "Are these boots a necessity."

"They are my favourite." He giggled, moving his feet so that his heels were apart and his toes were pressed against each other. Liam was fiddling with the shoe lace, trying to get it laced up and tied neatly - which was proving a hard job as Zayn didn't understand how to sit still. "Be still for me, love."

"Am still." He pouted. Liam simply nodded, not wanting to cause an argument or upset the boy. After some time of tying and untying, he found himself finished and they were ready to go. "Don't forget your pup."

"I could never forget 'im!" Zayn laughed, running and grabbing the tote. He swung it over his shoulders and ran back to Liam, connecting his hand into Liam's. The two fitting together like some cliche jigsaw. They were perfect for one another. Liam took step out of the door first and Zayn was quick to follow, swaying back and fourth as Liam locked up. "I so 'scited now that pup is here."

"I'm glad to hear. I'm excited that you're excited."

"Maybe we get more teddies?" Zayn suggested, looking up towards Liam with the same innocent eyes that Liam couldn't get enough of. His little was adorable. "Maybe... if you get a new teddy, will they have a name? Because they can't all have no name."

"Hmm. I fink about it." He giggled, holding Liam's hand tighter. "I name one afta you."

"That'd get confusing, silly!" He chuckled, smiling down at him. They headed off campus and into town, the fresh air hitting their faces and the both of their cheeks turning a faint red with the cold breeze. "It's a good day, Z. It's a good day."

"Good day!" He repeated, smiling even brighter back at him.