Owning Her| OLD

Chapter Thirty-Nine

Iris

I put Noah to bed and went back into the kitchen. Diana was sleeping on the couch and I got a blanket to cover her. I started to clean the kitchen up.

I didn't clean this morning since I wanted to get out of the house. I knew if I didn't get productive then I would have stayed inside. One of my goals is trying to get out more and enjoy the nature. I take that time to take Noah with me. Give Diana a break.

I still couldn't believe I bumped into Gray. It's only been two years and yet I felt like we were strangers. Time can do that people though. Hearing his voice, felt weird as well.

I put Noah's bottles in the sink and all the other plates in the sink. I never had the courage to call any of them after I left. I just couldn't bring myself to. It got so bad at one point that I did need someone and I remember what they said. They wouldn't help me since I didn't want the help.

I didn't want to be a burden and I thought about what my mom said. I didn't want her to be doing trips to hospital all over again. I think we was both in shock when we saw each other. It was embarrassing when he realized his number was already saved. I had his, my mom's and Elijah's saved. It was only for emergencies.

I had emergencies, but never called them. I guess it was too late by then. They would have already moved on and forgotten about me. I guess they didn't since they took care of my mom.

Gray seemed so shock to see I was alive. Did they think I was dead? If I was how long were they planning on taking care of my mom? They wouldn't have been able to do it forever. Grayson. I saw Grayson today. I actually fucking saw him. I was going to have to call my mom now. I didn't even want to call until I was sober for at least six months or a year.

I wanted to go back and made sure that they knew that I was for real. I would stop actually this time. I thought about the day they left. When Gray walked out and Elijah not wanting to give up on me. I ruined it for myself. I did it to myself. It was my fucking fault why I'm in this situation in the first place.

I finished cleaning up the kitchen and walked to my bedroom. I gently closed the door behind me and changed into my Pajamas. I got into bed and cuddled my stuffies. It was funny how I kept two of them. One from both of them. That was something I made sure I never lost.

I lost a whole lot of shit in the last two years, but the stuffies and a photo of my family I made sure to keep. I guess there was a bit of old me in there somewhere. I held them close to me and couldn't stop thinking about my fucking life. It went so shit, because of that night. I got my phone off the nightstand and went on Instagram.

I didn't want to be a stalker, but I was just curious now. I rarely ever look at their Instagram's but just in case. I looked at Grayson's profile first. He was the most active out of him and Elijah. No, I shouldn't look it's weird. A random number called and I declined it.

I knew it was Travis calling me. I fucking hate Travis so much. There was so many times that I actually wanted to sober up and he would just push me over the edge. He was a fucking addict as well and Diana's baby daddy. It was funny how I became friends with Diana when I realized she was the baby mom he kept talking about.

He lied on her name so many times I didn't even like her and I hadn't even met her. Just to find out he was lying. Why did I believe him in the first place? I was coked up, both of us were. I think I was emotionally dependent on Travis, because he listened and we did drugs together.

I pressed the button on my phone and it went black. I laid on the bed holding my stuffies and closed my eyes. I didn't want to, but I thought of them. What would have happened if I didn't choose this path for myself.