My best friends crush

23. I needed more.

When I got home I collapsed right onto the couch. My eyes shut and when I finally woke up again it was dark outside. My fever was getting worse. All I wanted to do was sleep, but I couldn't sleep forever.

I made myself some soup and continued watching a show on Netflix. My whole body was shivering so I tucked myself in a blanket.

I immediately turned the tv off when the show started. It was the show me and Ryan used to watch together. Now I couldn't stand watching it.

There are certain things—that I now hate, because they remind me of him. McDonald's I never eat anymore, because on our first real date we had that. I hate thinking about him, yet I do it. A lot.

I walked over to a cabin and pulled out a bottle of tequila. I know I'm not really supposed to drink on my own, because I always end up doing crazy stuff when I'm wasted.

Last time I bought Sophie a car, which I let her keep. I promised her I wouldn't do it again. That I wouldn't drink alone, but this time it was just to get my mind off things. Things I'd like to forget, but never will.

I tilted my head back and poured the liquid into my mouth. After a while it all got black and I believe I fell asleep.

+++

The next day I woke up with a headache and a empty bottle beside me. I hauled myself back to the cabin to find it also empty. My head was killing me, and I needed more. 

I was disgusted at the sight of myself in the bathroom mirror. My face was pale, and I had big purple circles under my eyes.

I grabbed a couple of painkillers and swallow them. It would do for a little, but I needed more liquid. And I wasn't old enough to get any on my own. Sophie probably had, but I knew she wouldn't give me. That left me with one person—Carlos.

He didn't live far away, so I decided to walk. My head was banging, and the painkillers didn't help. The light outside burned in my eyes, and the sunglasses I had put on didn't help either.

As I walked I suddenly remembered. He wasn't home today. It was the big football game today.

I sighed and turned around. School, I had to get to school. It felt like the way there was twice as long as it used to be. I struggled to keep myself on my feet. I was so tired, yet I had been sleeping for almost a day straight.

I finally arrived and I could hear cheering coming from the field. As I got closer I looked around trying to find Carlos.

The tribune was crowded with both people I knew and some I didn't. I pulled the hood over my head so people wouldn't recognize me. Not that anyone would, I just didn't want Sophie to see me.

I looked closer at the tribune, but couldn't spot Carlos anywhere. I started looking at the football field to see if he was there, but how are anyone to be recognized in those suits. I suddenly spotted him at the bench beside the field.

He was sitting with the helmet in his lap fully concentrated on the game. I walked fast towards where he was sitting, but got stopped by what I thought to be the couch. "Hey! You can't be here." He said strictly. His attention wasn't even on me as he spoke.

"Damn it! You're supposed to throw the ball Newman, not kick it!" He hissed to one of the players.

I snuck past him and ran over to Carlos. As I stepped in front of him he looked at me confused. "He-," I didn't let him finish before I dragged him with me behind one of the tribunes.