Married Into The Mafia *Undergoing Re-editing*

A Mistake

--Eloise--

The winds were cold up north. I had gotten so used to the sticky heat of Australia over the past few years that I had forgotten what it was like to shiver against an icy breeze or jolt up in surprise when sitting down on a snow-layered bench. After scraping off the small dune of snow, I placed myself back down, warming my cold hand with the heat of the coffee in my hands.

The air was frosty but silent as I sat there in contemplate. The white blanket of snow over everything was peaceful to look at and it was a quiet area that was undisturbed by the buzz of a city. I remember when I had wished for a place like this with Ashton. A calm, remote town in a cosy residential area.

I stared down the line of nude-coloured houses before stopping on one with a white picket fence as I've always wanted. I took a sip of my coffee as my hand reached into my parker's pocket. Inside was a small, folded parchment. I brought it out and unravelled it to gaze at the address written on it. My eyes flickered back to that house. That should be it, alright.

I crumpled the paper back up in my hand before stuffing it into my pocket and gulping down my coffee. I couldn't believe that after all these years, it was right there – a few houses down from where I was.

I thought I'd be bounding down the pathway as I got closer but when it came to it, I didn't dare to cross the threshold of this bench. I had stood here for a good ten minutes before turning back and grabbing a coffee to ponder over.

Why was I so afraid? I should be ecstatic, shouldn't I? I'm finally here after all that planning and running away. Right where I wanted to be...right? Yeah... This is where I wanted to be. So, then why wasn't I going over? Why wasn't I knocking on the door?

What was I so afraid of?

That it was all too good to be true...

Finding out Ashton was alive, the escape from my dad, the journey back to America and finally coming within feet of his house. It was so smoothly done and too perfect to seem real. Had I just gotten used to things going wrong in my life? Was this why I felt so uncertain?

Or was it something else? Not on my part but Ashton's.

What if he didn't love me anymore? What if he had changed? What if he had suddenly moved houses?

My mind was chaotic with doubts and concerns. Truthfully, I was petrified to actually meet him again after so long. It felt like I was meeting a stranger. It felt out of place for me to try and fit myself back into his new life. Like our lives shouldn't be colliding anymore – fated to live separate. But would it really be possible for me to go back now? Dad would definitely realise I had tried to run, and all my freedom will be gone forever.

But I could always, for once, try living for myself, by myself? I could also, hideaway and get a job, meet another man and start a family. It was possible...

The curl of my fingers around the cup tightened as I frowned at that option. It's true, I could but...at least once, I want to see him. I felt a longing for him. I still love him. I wanted to live out that dream with him that I had long ago.

But, will he accept me?

Huffing out a cloud of hot air, I moved the cup from my lap to the seat beside me, using my free hands to form small fists of decisiveness. Alright, let's do this. There's no point in me coming all this way to dawdle around in front of his house.

Regardless of the outcome, I shouldn't waste this trip. I've been waiting for this for so long; I'll definitely regret it if I turn back now.

With that burst of determination, I swept myself back onto my feet and spun on my heels towards the direction of the house. A breath pushed out of me in the form of condensed air as I tightened my hands into fists. I can do this.