Robins Home For Boys (bxb+)

Vans

The sudden rush of wind coming through the open window hit my face with a force that made me shudder involuntarily, and also waking me up.

I could hear Lilith's voice calling out from outside our room, urging everyone to hurry up. It seemed like she was in a hurry and didn't want to waste any more time.

That's when Kayden came up to me, "JJ, get up, we're leaving!" he exclaimed, his tone urgent. He quickly gathered his belongings and handed me my bag, which was lying on the floor beside me. I scrambled to my feet, groggily rubbing my eyes as I tried to shake off the sleepiness. It was clear that Kayden was in a hurry, so I wasted no time in getting ready to leave.

"I haven't changed, or done anything yet!" I tell him, confused.

"You can't, just stay in your PJs like me" Chris came into view, still in his plaid night clothes.

I jolted up the moment Chris left the room,  just putting socks on and my bag.

"JJ come on!" Lizzy bolted into the room in her star-patterned nightgown and grabbed my hand pulling me out of the room.

"Lilith is getting mad at anyone that's late," Lizzy explained the hurry.

We hurriedly descended the stairs, our feet pounding against the wooden steps. We scrambled to put on our shoes while trying to keep up with the other kids who had also overslept. Amidst the chaos and commotion, we could hear muffled voices and the sound of doors opening and closing as others were opening the door rushing out.

As soon as we stepped out of the house, Amanda pointed out that two vans were parked right in front of us. She gestured towards the vehicle on the right and informed me that it belonged to the boys, while the one on the left was designated for the girls. I noticed that both vans appeared to be in good condition, but seemed pretty small for the amount of kids that were going to being transported.

"I'm going to miss you," Amanda told me and Kayden before bringing both of us in a warm embrace.

"We will miss you too" I grabbed both of her shoulders and hugged her again before she walked off to her van, helping some of the younger girls get up into it before she hopped in.

That's when Lizzy looked at me.

As I looked at her, I could sense that she was struggling to hold back tears. I could see the water starting to well up in her eyes, and soon enough, it was streaming down her cheeks.

Despite the tears, she managed to force a smile and pulled me into a tight embrace. I could feel her warm breath on my ear as she whispered, "I love you." Her voice was trembling with emotion, and I knew that this was a moment that would stay with me forever.

As I was about to leave, she leaned in close and whispered in my ear, "Take this with you and call me when you get there." She grabbed my hand forcefully and placed a small piece of paper in my palm. I could feel the warmth of her breath on my cheek as she gave me a gentle kiss before letting go.

As I stood there, observing her every move, I noticed how she hopped into the van with a spring in her step. She turned around, her eyes meeting mine, and she waved goodbye with a smile that seemed to light up the entire area, tears still streaming down her cheek until she wiped them with the back of her hand.

I watched as the door closed shut, muffling the sounds of the bustling street outside. The driver started the engine, the gentle hum of the motor filling the air, and the van pulled out of the front, moving steadily towards the road.

As I stood there lost in thought, I was suddenly jolted back to reality by the sound of Kayden's voice. He was yelling to me from inside the truck, but I hadn't even realized he was trying to get my attention.

My mind had been consumed with a swirling mix of emotions that left me feeling both queasy and overwhelmed. It wasn't until Kayden's urgent cries broke through my reverie that I finally snapped out of it and realized it was time to go.

As I hopped in, I immediately noticed how cramped and stiflingly humid it was inside. I tried to take deep breaths to calm myself, but I could already feel my chest tightening with the beginnings of claustrophobia.

That's when Kayden noticed my unease and suggested opening the window. I eagerly complied and stuck my head through the window, feeling the cold breeze on my face. It was a refreshing sensation and made me feel less suffocated.

"Thank you," I faced him, "no problem" he replied, wrapping an arm around my shoulder before he car started it's engine and I could feel the tires moving on the gravel.

As the car accelerated, the trees lining the road turned into a blur. I leaned against the window, lost in thought. The cool glass pressed against my cheek, and I watched as the scenery rushed past me in a blur of green and brown.

The wind whipped through my hair, and I felt my heart race with eagerness on knowing when I can call Lizzy. The world outside seemed to be moving in fast forward, while my mind was stuck in slow motion, lost in contemplation.

That's when I realized, it's been forever since I've in a car, or outside of Liliths property. When I was younger it felt fine.

But now that I am older, I realize that this has put me at a severe disadvantage. I lack the social skills and experiences that most people my age have, and I fear that this will make it difficult for me to succeed in life. I am worried about how my future will turn out, and I feel like Im going to have to constantly be playing catch-up with the rest of the world.

Of course, we had our math books, and just normal books. But that wasn't enough. I barley knew how to read and that was a problem.

As I reflect on Lilith's neglect, it's hard not to wonder how she managed to keep all of us together. The truth is, the older kids were the ones who held everything together.

We all had to pitch in and help with everything from cooking meals to cleaning the house. It was a tough situation, but somehow we made it work. Looking back, I can't help but feel grateful for the lessons in responsibility and teamwork that we learned during those difficult times.

Out of all the tasks, I found sewing to be the most enjoyable task. Lilith made us do sewing, so we could fix up old blankets, or make clothing pieces out of old cloth.

Lizzy often complimented my skills and suggested that I should create more pieces. It got me thinking, maybe at my new location, I could continue to pursue my passion for sewing! I even considered making something special for Lizzy as a way to show my appreciation for her encouragement.

I could start to feel my self dose off at the thought of handing something pretty to Lizzy, her holding me in her arms as she talked about the weird things that interested her.

I miss her, I miss everything.

Btw Lizzys and JJs relationship is purely platonic, like he said there basically brother and sister. And you might find out a little about Lizzy later on in the story, that probably won't surprise you since this is an LGBTQ book 😏.