The Green Rose bxb

Chapter 12

Sam's POV

Yawning, I reach one arm to rub the sleep from my eyes. As I fully wake up, Oliver lays, still sleeping, on my chest, our legs tangled at the other side of the couch.

Shit, I fell asleep in my binder! I'll be fine for a bit longer, right?

I rest my arms around Ollie and lay like this for a while. It's comfortable and I don't want to wake him up. When Ollie starts to wake up I glance down as he keeps his head where it rests on my chest and uses one hand to rub his face.

"Good morning," I smile as I speak quietly. My voice is a bit more rough since I just woke up.

"What time is it?" He sounds a lot more tired than me.

I reach for my phone to check. "Almost noon."

Oliver groans and buries his face in my shirt. "Do we have to get up?"

"It's Saturday so no, but I should take my binder off if we're going back to sleep."

"What?" He moves his head to look at me, his glasses lay on the floor so he squints.

"My binder, I fell asleep in it last night and that's not very safe," he looks confused. "It flattens my chest. I'm trans so I sort of need it," I elaborate.

"Oh," he seems to understand. "So we have to get up?"

"At least for a minute," I chuckle as I nod.

"Fine," he sighs and sits up, grabbing his glasses from the floor. I quickly go to my room and change out of the binder, putting on a sports bra and a baggier t-shirt before going back to the living room. Oliver is sitting on the couch with his glasses on, barely staying awake.

"You're that tired huh?" I chuckle as he looks up at me and I join him on the couch.

"Yeah," he nods, yawning as he leans more into the couch.

"Here," I take his glasses off of him as we move so that he's lying on my chest again. His head rests on my shoulder as his arms wrap around my stomach.

Almost instantly, Oliver is sleeping and I smile, holding him close as I go back to sleep too. When I wake up again, Oliver is still lying on top of me. Carefully, I reach for my phone to check the time. Almost three in the afternoon.

Should I wake him up? I don't know. He's had a long night. He needs rest. But he's also been sleeping all day.

A slight sniffle comes from the boy lying on me and I feel a small drop hit my shirt. He's crying. Is he still sleeping? "Ollie?" I speak softly so if he is still sleeping I don't wake him up.

"Yeah?" I can barely hear him but he sounds sad. More sad than last night.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah," I can feel him nod as he sniffles again.

"Are you sure?"

"No."

"Do you wanna talk?"

"I don't know what I want," he holds tight to me so I tighten my arms around him to try and help.

"Okay," I nod. "I'm here if you need me."

"I need you to stay," I nod and we lay like this for another while.

Most of the day goes by with us lying on the couch, making a few comments and conversations every once in a while. Both of our stomachs grumble around six so I tell Ollie to find something to watch if he wants to while I make dinner.

"All I have is; stuff to make spaghetti, mac'n'cheese and microwave meals," I say as I look through my stuff. "Do you want me to go get something else or are you okay with one of those?"

"Spaghetti sounds good," he seems more relaxed now as he sits on the couch with his glasses back on.

"Spaghetti it is," I start cooking and, as the water boils, I sit on the couch with Ollie. He put on the show we were watching last night and we continue it while I cook.

I can watch the TV from the kitchen as I get everything ready. Once the food is on two plates, I take them to the couch and we eat as we watch the show. When we're done eating I take the dishes back to the sink so I can wash them. As I'm rinsing off the last one, I can feel Oliver rest his head on my back with a sniffle.

"Can I wrap my arms around your stomach?" he asks.

"Sure," I nod and once his arms are around me I set the dish on the counter to dry before holding his hands lightly where they are. His glasses sit on the counter next to the dishes as we stand here.

"It hurts," his soft voice breaks the silence as we stand in the kitchen. He sounds almost broken.

"I know," I've had some experience.

"When will it get better?"

"I don't know but I know you'll be okay. I'm here, your mom, Ash, and Leah are too. We all have your back."

"I'm scared. What if Dad does something? He's always been angry and aggressive. What if he-" his voice breaks and I turn around, letting Ollie keep his arms around me as I lightly put a hand on his cheek to make him look at me. His hair falls over his forehead and slightly down his face. He looks different without his hair all neat and perfectly placed like usual.

"Hey, I can't promise anything when it comes to your dad but I can promise that if it gets that bad you and your mom are welcome here. You are one of the strongest people I know and your mom is just as strong." His eyes are watery and a few tears fall down his face. "You'll be okay."

"How can you be so sure?" He looks at me with so much pain in his eyes. It hurts to see him like this.

"I've been in a similar situation," I shrug slightly. "It was years ago but I know it hurts. It hurts and you probably think that it won't get any better. That your whole life is changing and you're not in control. Am I right?" He nods and I move my hand away from his face, wrapping my arms around him the same way he has his arms around me. "I can't change any of that but I know that you have control, the pain doesn't ever completely go away but it does get better, and even though so much is changing right now, not everything will. You're still in control of so many things and I know a few things that will never change."

"Like what?" he seems to be feeling a little better, it's obvious that he's still sad though. I can't blame him.

"Ash and Leah are still your friends, your mom is happy for us and I know she'll never stop loving you, and no matter what happens I'll be here if you want me to be. My feelings for you won't change. Ever."

"Thanks," he sniffles with a small, sad smile. "For everything." He brings himself closer to me, resting his head just under my collarbone as he hugs me. I gently hold him here and the only noise that can be heard is the slight buzzing from the TV that's left on with the show paused.