Not So Simple Feelings

F O U R.

"That's right baby girl!!" I croaked as Taylor Swift screamed 'We are never getting back together' from my phone.

"Oh my sweet bitch, you're gonna love me even more, if that's possible!" Tola yelled as she slammed the door to the apartment behind her.

She came into the living room with two paper bags and extracted alcohol, lime and salt. She plopped down beside me, smiling impishly.

I shook my head weakly "Uhn uhn. No no no...I'm not doing this."

I knew I didn't have a choice..

"Nope. Baby, he hurt you, yeah, you've moped about enough and I'm not taking it  anymore. Tonight's the night you drink your liver out!" She unscrewed a bottle and splashed a lot into the glasses she had set down and set about preparing what I was certain was poison. "Now, I've brought enough alcohol to last us till next year."

I didn't argue. I didn't have the strength to argue with Tola. Tola, as a typical Nigerian girl, had a very hot mouth and never ever took no for an answer.

I tentatively lifted the glass to my lips and took a sip and cringed but I felt my head clearing out. I took another sip, then downed the whole glass.

"Whoa" Tola said, chuckling " O je rora"*

I loved it when she spoke yoruba. It added a certain flair to her words.

She lined up shot glasses, which for some reason she had and started filling them up.

We both grabbed one "To hating shitty men with shitty dicks!" I yelled. We clinked glasses and downed the contents. My throat burned then I felt the sweet sweet buzz.

"ooh I got one, I got one!" We each grabbed another glass "To pushing men who eat apples with a fork over a bridge!" We emptied the glasses again.

Awwn I'd always thought it was cute when he did that.

                   ********
2 hours later

We were dancing. There was no music. But we were dancing.

At least I think there was no music...

I couldn't really hear anything but a sweet pleasant buzz in my head anymore.

Tola collapsed on the carpet and I joined her, feeling dizzy.

"Liv, list ten good things about lil Marky boy. If you can't, you have to do one more shot."

Easy.

"He was kind"

"What?!"

"Okay, okay, he was..." I bit my lip. Maybe it was the alcohol but my mind was totally blank. "Good in bed?"

Tola smiled sympathetically "Oh honey, I doubt it. I've seen that thing down below"

I didn't even ask. Tola was crazy.

But she was right.

"He was?-" I bit my lip harder "Oh fuck it" I took the last shot glass and emptied it down my throat.

Tola was staring at me wide eyed. And then we burst into laughter for no reason.

"I've got nothing cccos he's such an animal!" My stomach hurt from laughing.

"Yeah! How did you even end up with him!"

"I-" I paused to catch my breath "I don't know!" I stopped laughing "I only attract people like him. Jerks who just wanna wet their dick a little."

She stopped laughing too and hugged me "Oh honey. That isn't true."

"It is! I'm a jerk magnet! But you know what?"

"What?" she said into my hair.

"I'm staying off men"

She released me "What??"

"Yeah, like men rehab. I'm never going  to feel anything for a man again. If it's sex, it's just sex. But I ain't being a girlfriend again."

"I don't know about that Liv..."

"C'moooooooonnnnn" I whined.

"Seriously, you just aren't a 'just sex' kinda girl. You believe in soulmates and love and happy ending and all those stupid stuff.." She said, air quoting the 'just sex'

"Uhn uhn. Not anymore!"

She looked really doubtful "okaaay if you say so."

"A toast!"

"Yeah! A toast!" She leaned towards the table to pour some more alcohol but her hands weren't steady and she kept sploshing it all over the table. "Fuck this" She handed me a bottle and took one too.

"To never being a girlfriend again!"

And right before I passed out on the floor, I thought about the guy from the restaurant. The guy with the eyes that seemed to see into your soul.

Now that's somebody who I could do just sex with.

Somebody she could do just sex with 😂😂😂. Please voooootee!!!💕

*- Be careful