Kisses after midnight (WICKED #0) | ✓

8

JAY HATED HIS NAME. He hated the fact his parents had thought of it, hated the meaning, the way it meant talent and excellence, as if it was mocking his lack of both. Most of all, he hated the way it sounded when it reverbated through that empty house, each and every time his father yelled it.

He hated everything which had anything to do with his father. The expensive clothes he wore, bought with that man's money, disgusted him, but he knew better than to just pick something of his own. The repercussions of that were still engraved on his hands, the scars a faded silver now.

There was no exact point in time where everything had gone wrong. As far as he could remember, his father always had been like this. The man surprisingly loved his other son though, as far as he could love. Jay did too, though he really didn't see his older brother often. He was sent off to some important school overseas as soon as he could walk, training to follow in his father's footsteps.

His brother called him often though and when he could he always tried to visit home. Jay always liked when he was home. Somehow that large, cold house seemed a bit warmer then.

"You want a smoke, Jay?"

Jay looked up at the guy in front of him. He didn't remember his name, but he was always at this spot, along with his friends. They smoked their day away and complained about their jobs or school, or both. Looking at them, they reminded him a lot of the people he had seen at the new school he was attending.

Well, attending was a big word for it. He was planning to skip everything and who knew, perhaps soon they'd kick him out of that one too. Although his father controlled almost everything in his life, up from the things he wore to the people who surrounded him, he wouldn't give him this. Everything else he couldn't do anything about, but he wouldn't give the man the satisfaction of knowing he was doing his best at school for him.

It wasn't like he felt any need to go there anyway. Though he hated his house and would do anything to escape it, school wasn't a refuge either. There wasn't anyone who didn't know his father and even if that wasn't the reason they tried to befriend him, he had found out the hard way his father paid some to get close to him. The bitter memory made him grit his teeth.

He felt watched, all the time. It was like he was in a play, except he was doing everything wrong and everyone was laughing at how useless he was, how much of a disappointment to his perfect father. Oh, if only he could break this whole stage.

Though he was always surrounded by people, he still felt so alone.

So he skipped class and went to the outskirts of town, as far from his father's reach as he could get, and hung out with people who seemed like they didn't care about politics at all. At least here he felt less tense for a second. He took the cigarette out of the guy's hand and lighted it. When he inhaled, his eyes closed and for a second, the world disappeared.

He just wanted to feel numb.

To hell with his father and his angry screams when he decided to send him to some delinquent school after he had defied him one too many times. To hell with all of them, except his brother, even if he had left him alone.

Sahar's face flashed in front of his eyes then and he shook his head. She was bubbly and sweet, as if made of starlight, but it all seemed to be too good to be true. It had to be his father's influence. Why else would a pretty girl like her want to associate with someone like him? They never had spoken a word before until she had grabbed him by the wrist on one of the rare days he was at school, before persuading him to join her climate strike.

He had been baffled at first, before surprising himself more by nodding yes. It had been a combination of wanting to turn that damn school upside down and curiosity for this rich girl who was doing a climate strike in the middle of a place filled with snobs. And the school had been turned upside down, although it had surprised even him when it had resulted in his expulsion.

Ever since she had been thrown out with him she seemed attached to him for some unknown reason. He would have been sure his father had sent her to spy on him, if not for her personality. She was everything his father despised; spontaneous, naive, rebellious. Surely he wouldn't have chosen her.

Right?

When the hesitation filled him he just inhaled deeply again, the smoke spilling from his lips. He just had to keep pushing her away, her and all of them. There was no way he could take that risk of being betrayed again, not when it had hurt that much the first time.

He didn't have much of his heart left already.

His phone went off then and he blinked lazily, before fishing it out of his pocket. Once he saw who was calling his eyes were wide open though, adrenaline already coursing through his veins. Everything inside of him screamed not to pick up, but he knew better than that after all these years.

"Yes?" he breathed out, the phone against his ear.

"Have you been skipping class, Jae-Soo?"

To any other person his voice would have sounded worried, but Jay heard the underlying threat, the unnerving calm behind it all. He knew what tonight would be like and also that he wouldn't be able to escape it, no matter how far he ran. His father always found him.

How did he find out he was skipping though? After years at Athena Jay had managed to find every single one of his father's rats and he had paid them and the teachers all off not to report anything except the bare minimum so as not to make him suspicious. With the climate strike it had all gone too far for him to keep it hidden, especially with the blood of the vice-principal on his knuckles, but at least at this new school he hadn't expected his father to find new rats that fast.

He had expected it to take a week at least, if only because his father despised delinquents and everything to do with them. Besides, the students at St Joseph had seemed like they hated authorities and figures like his father as well, so he had hoped it would take a while for the man to find someone.

False hopes, again.

His eyes were hazy as he stared at his cigarette and before he knew what he was doing, he put it out on his hand. The guys beside him all stared at him in shock, but Jay didn't feel any pain, despite the fact his skin was definitely burned.

The call had been ended, so Jay slung his arm back and threw his phone on the ground as hard as he could. It flew through the air, before cracking as it hit the floor and then bouncing up again, only to land in the river.

When he heard the splash he turned around and left, on his way to return to his usual stage.