The Aurelia⎪✓

{56}

Aegis

(n.) protection; support

♡

"My Aspen.." She whispered as she came closer, her arms opened wide ready to embrace. She had a slight limp to her leg and I momentarily wondered what had happened to her and where my dad was. 

I lifted my hand in the air before she came too close and ended up hugging me, "No, just.. please don't."

Her eyes seemed confused by me rejecting her advances, but I couldn't make sense of the situation right now. I didn't even know if this was a dream or not. My body felt caged, like I was drowning and there was nothing I could do to save myself. 

I wanted to know everything, how they were, where they'd been, why she came alone. I wanted to hug the woman I used to call mom, but I wasn't sure if she was that for me anymore. My heart thumped in my chest, threatening to explode if I didn't calm down soon. 

"Honey, it's me," She paused, her blue eyes filled with unshed tears, "I'm here now, please, it's just me."

Clutching my stomach by the pain of hearing her voice and not recognizing it, I squeezed my eyes shut to calm myself down, "Why.. What happe- Where's dad?" I stuttered, my eyes still closed.

"Is there somewhere we can talk, maybe in your house? Your mate can join us, I just need a little privacy. Please, I'm sorry." She desperately said, my eyes opening as I could feel her come closer. 

I stepped away from her advance once again and nodded to her question, silently leading her to the pack house. The walk felt too long, but I focused on matching my heartbeat to Arrax's. He gave me the space I needed, I could feel his presence and that was exactly what I needed. 

As we walked into the house, it was empty and I knew Arrax had demanded all of them to leave. My head was jumbled so I hadn't managed to even consider the chance that they might still be here. Sitting down on the couch, my mate sat down next to me, giving me room enough to breathe. 

Observing my mother as she struggled to sit down, I once again wondered what had happened to her. I never thought I'd see her again, so this was such an overwhelming experience.

"I'll tell you everything, but can't I just say how beautiful you are. My baby is a grown woman now." She started, the choke in her voice almost breaking my walls, almost. 

"Thank you, now please tell me what has happened during the last 8 years." I asked her, the clipped tone in my voice not going unnoticed. 

She fiddled with her hands as she looked me straight into the eyes, "Your dad and I made the hardest decision of our lives 8 years ago, we wished for you to have a fulfilling life, honey, and we couldn't give that to you. We're creatures of the Moon Goddess, we're made to need a soulmate, to yearn for one. How could we rip you from that chance?" She rhetorically asked, I knew she was being honest, but I already knew this. 

"It was never the same after you closed the door, life changed completely. Your dad couldn't live with the thought of what we'd done, how scared you must've been, he felt like it was selfish of us. His thoughts got the better of him and he grew enraged, his pain turning to anger, his anger turning to alcohol. I don't know how to explain this to you, but your father passed away three years ago." A pained whimper left her lips, making my heart ache for them. 

"He wanted to find you, so bad, and when we finally decided to go look, his body shut down. He believed it was the Moon Goddess punishing him for the decision he made with you. Every night I stayed by his side, watching him curl into a ball and sob by the thought of what had happened to you. Sorrow and his body failing killed him one early December morning and my heart has never been the same since then." She explained, as tears streamed down her face, my heart felt her pain as I cried too. 

Cried for the family we once were, cried for the agony both my mom and dad had been through, cried for everything I'd missed.

Crying for the loss of my dad. 

"I'm so sorry that I had to tell you this, I wish your dad could himself, but he wanted me to tell you that he loved you with every fiber of his being until he'd one day explode from love." She laughed lightly as I joined in. That was my dad's way of describing his love for me, it was a saying that I'd picked up in other situations too, I adored it.  

"I'm so sorry you had to go through that, mom." I apologized, my heart feeling heavy by the thought of how painful it must've been for the both of them. 

"We're here now, sweetheart, your father is smiling down at us with the Goddess. I knew I had to find you, even if I'd end up killed in the process. I needed to find you and tell you how much he loved you, how much I love you. You're our one baby and I can't be without you anymore." She declared, the underlying tones of begging in her voice broke my heart.

I'd preached this same thing to Lilly, over and over again, so I would never be hypocritical, not even if I wanted to. This woman was my mother and you only get one of those, Aurelias fuck up, but they'll always have their family's love. This is me being my mom's love. 

Hurrying and sitting down next to her, I hugged her small frame, pulling her to my body. The sobs racked my body immediately as I felt relief, her smell and heartbeat, this was my mom. "You won't ever have to again, mom."