Let me love you

Chapter 43

I rub my cleansing lotion all over my face, thinking about what just happened an hour ago. 

I'm happy that things between me and Jacob were cleared out. I'm sure that the next few upcoming weeks will be a little bit awkward probably, but I do think that with time we'll go back to exactly how we were before. 

I splash water on my face after I finish cleansing and grab a towel patting my face dry. This evening was surely interesting but it's not over yet, I do want to talk to Ian again.

Should I change into my pyjamas first or should I talk to Ian now? I'll talk to Ian first and then change. I put on my coat again and go to my balcony only to see Ian already on his, leaning against the door already looking towards me.

"Ian, " I say, surprised that he was there.

"Where did you go?" He asks, eying me up and down.

"I was out with Jacob, " I tell him the truth since there's no point in lying.

"You didn't waste any time, did you?" He scoffs, shaking his head whilst shoving his hands in his jogger's pockets.

"Ian, " I say, taking a few steps closer and resting my hands on the fence.

"So, how was your date? Did you fuck him as well? If you did, I guess he did a terrible job, I didn't hear shit from your bedroom, " he says, looking away from me and at his shoes.

"The date was nice, we ate, we watched a movie, he made me laugh and he was a gentleman. We also took a brief walk around a beautiful garden and oh, I kiss him twice, " I say, shrugging as I'm kind of enjoying pressing his buttons and seeing that fire in his eyes intensified.

"That's good to know, so no sex for you tonight?" He's really being blunt with his words tonight.

"No, I don't usually have sex on the first date. It really depends on the person and the connection I have with them, " I say, biting my lip to stop myself from smiling.

"That's good to know, " he scoffs again, biting his lip as well, all whilst still not sparing me a glance.

"Something else though did happen afterwards. You see we sat down on a bench and that's where I kiss him and then, " I say.

"Honestly spare me the details Chloe, " he interrupts me, but I ignore him.

"Then I told him exactly how I was feeling about him and, " I continue but once again I'm being interrupted.

"I don't want to know, " he says, turning his head just a tiny bit towards my side still avoiding eye contact.

"I let him know I wasn't feeling the same way. I told him that I have my eyes on someone else and we both agree to stay good friends like we always were, "  I smile not being able to restrict myself any longer.

I watch him as he froze for a second, his jaw clenching as he takes a big gulp, seeing his adam apple move. He turns his face completely towards me and finally looks me in the eyes. 

"As I told you before, I would've only had given Jacob a chance if I wasn't interested in someone else. Did you really think I would've hurt you like that intentionally?" I say, putting my hands in the pockets of my jacket and turning to lean on my side on the door.

"What do you mean?" He asks, moving forward so he's no longer leaning on the door.

"Even though you pushed me away, I know that you feel the same way I do. What are you so afraid of Ian? Why not give us a chance?" I say, taking a few steps back on my balcony as Ian jumps from his to mine.

Even though our balconies are fairly close to one another it's still a big jump and my heart clenches every time momentarily.

"I don't want to get hurt. I'm shielding myself from future heartbreak. I didn't give you a chance because...I, " he curses under his breath, running his hand through his hair.