Iliana's POV
"Kai."
"Can I?" She looked inside and then at me.
"Of course, this is your house."
"Yeah doesn't feel like it," she mumbled while walking pass me and into the house. "I won't take long I just came for some things."
I felt myself panic, "No no no, Kai please let's talk, please." I practically begged her as I followed her around.
"We have nothing to talk about you lied and cheated, we are done I want the divorce. Hope you two have a nice life."
I groaned while I felt my tears start to roll down my cheeks. I stood in front of her stopping her from going up for her things. I'm not letting her go before she at least listens to me.
"We do please just... let me explain and then you can decide if you want me out of your life please."
She looked conflicted deciding on whether listen to me or not and after some time without an answer she ultimately nodded her head and sat at the booth of the bar. "You have ten minutes, nothing else."
I took a breath, okay whatever I say next can either ruin or possibly save my marriage.
"Where have you been?"
"You asked me to let you explain and I did, I'm not here so you can interrogate me. It's none of your business where I was."
Her words hurt but I know that I deserve it so I can only take them, "I know, sorry."
"Just say what you want to say and let's be done with it," she said carelessly.
"What you heard the other night about Emma and I-"
"That you slept with her? Yeah I remember."
I sighed.
"Yes that, I want to explain to you how it happened."
Kai shook her head and stood up, "I don't want to hear that."
"No you say you would listen to me and the ten minutes aren't up yet." I complained and she sat back.
"Go on," she mumbled not looking at me.
So I began and told her everything without missing a detail. From how Emma had been there since her accident, to the week prior to what I did and finally to the day it happened, why, how and when it happened. I could see many emotions crossing her face as I told her everything, I couldn't recognize all of them but the ones I saw the most were anger, sadness and betrayal.
We sat in silence as Kai took in and processed everything I told her. I was so nervous that I even thought I would pass out at any second, I just wanted to know what she's thinking before the wait killed me.
"You found out that the doctors wanted to practically kill me off and then a week later you were getting fucked by my friend - who also slept with me in the past."
When she puts it like that it makes me hates myself even more. I was preparing myself to speak but Kai continued her rant.
"Not only that but you two also fucked on the house I bought for us - mind you while I was dying. This was supposed to be the house where we would raise our children, where we would form a family and have a life together Iliana and you... you ruined that. Don't get me wrong I will beat the hell out of Emma when I see her for taking advantage of you but it doesn't change the fact that you cheated. Being drunk is not an excuse."
"We can still have that Kai please give me a chance to prove it to you." I begged her as I took her hands
Kai just shook her head this time with some tears falling from her eyes. "I can't, I can't," she took her hands back.
"Why not?" I asked hearing my voice break.
"Because I can't look at you without feeling disgusted by you and what you did Iliana!"
Hearing that hurt me even more than before but I knew I had to take it all.
"We can get through this please forgive me."
"I can't," she sniffed.
I nodded feeling defeated, "Just tell me one thing."
"What."
"Tell me you're not in love with me anymore and I'll leave you. I'll sign the divorce papers if that's what you want. But just tell me."
Those green eyes of her that now looked so broken stared back at me after what it felt like forever. Her mouth opened and closed several times before she said something.
"I- you- you can't do this," she stood up and looked everywhere else but at me.
"Tell me please."
"You know the answer to that and it's not fair."
"Then I will say it. I love you Malakai. I'm so in love with you that knowing I will lose you is killing me."
Now Kai was full on crying in front of me. It's weird to see her cry because ever since I know Kai I think I've only seen her doing it twice, this being the second. "You know I love you too Iliana but I can't keep doing this."
I cupped her face and was surprised when she didn't back or pushed me away. "Forgive please just give me a chance."
"All you do is hurt me Iliana."
Her words felt like a punch in the gut because I know they were true. Kai has never done anything to hurt, she has never once done me wrong even before we were in a relationship and yet I've lost count on all the things I've done. From freezing her out of my life for two years to cheating on her.
"I know baby and I'm sorry- god I'm so fucking sorry." I hugged her as I now cried with her.
"I want to forgive you but I can't..." Kai pulled back to look at me. "Iliana I trust you with my life, you've been there with me through the hardest time of my life. Now I don't know if it was out of pity or guilt but you were there... but I'm not sure if I can ever trust you with my heart again."
"It wasn't because of none of that it was because I love you Kai so much it could never be because of that."
"I'm going to grab my things," she turned to walk upstairs.
"No Kai," I whimpered and grabbed her hand making her look at me again.
"I'll just get some things, I need some time alone to think but I... I'll be back and we'll talk again. I just need time alone."
"Can you at least let me know you're okay?"
Kai nodded, "Okay."
I let her go get her things while I stayed down here. The last thing I wanted was to overwhelm her.
Once Kai came down she had a bag on her free hand while the other had her crutch. "This is it, I'll get going now."
I followed her to the door knowing nothing I said would make her stay. "Will you come back?"
She sighed, "Just give me time Iliana, like I said, I need to think about everything. Don't worry I won't disappear."
"Fine. Goodbye Kai... I love you."
"Bye."
That was the only thing she said before leaving the house. I saw her car parked outside but it seemed like someone else was driving it, leaving an unsettling feeling on the pit of my stomach.
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