Seeing Shane Gray ✓

fourteen | guilt

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October 9

Riley neither calls me nor replies to my text, and I end up giving up trying to reach out to her. As much as I want to make sure my friend is safe and well, there isn't much more I can do than I already have. As for Marla, she has stopped caring. Her entire focus is on making sure she gives Hashir the best birthday of his life.

"It's his first birthday since we've been apart and I don't want that," she says, packing her bag while I sit on the edge of her bed and watch her excitedly grab things from her wardrobe and tossing them into her suitcase. It's actually so cute how eager she is to fly hundreds of miles to see her boyfriend and surprise him on his birthday.

"You sure you don't want to drop a hint to him so that he's actually home when you get there?" I ask, not wanting her to feel disappointed.

"I know where he lives, I know where he goes to class, I know which club he parties at, and which friends he hangs out with," she tells me. "Don't worry about it, I'll be fine."

I laugh, nodding and feeling vicarious happiness. Marla is practically glowing after the facial she had done yesterday and the new hairstyle which definitely suits her more than the braids she's had for the entire past year. With her nest of curls and a bunch of new clothes she got especially for the occasion, she's packed and ready to go.

"I'll be gone one week," she tells me as she hugs me goodbye. "Take care of yourself."

"Take lots of pictures," I tell Marla. "I want to enjoy my singlehood by being happy for your incredible love life."

She laughs, hugging me back when I tackle her in a big bear-hug.

Her mom yells from downstairs, telling us Marla needs to leave for the airport or she's going to be late. Marla rolls her eyes but smiles anyway, knowing as well as I do that she's lucky to have parents like hers. Her big dad and mom who says 'y'all' so many times I end up laughing are more like friends than parents. That makes everything better.

"You want me to drop you to school, Taylor?" Marla's older sister asks me. "We have a few minutes before we have to be at the airport. You know mama always yelling anyway."

"I'll be fine, thanks." I laugh, watching the humdrum in the house intensify. Marla's bags are carried to the small minivan and everything begins to hug her goodbye. Although I'm neither family nor going anywhere, I'm somehow in the middle of every group hug. They constantly feed me something that both smells and tastes heavenly. By the time it's eight, I leave Marla's house and start walking toward the bus stop.

Pulling my phone out of my pocket, I see four missed calls and two unread messages. Unaccustomed to someone actually calling me, my mind goes straight to Mom and Dad. I expect -- and hope -- to find them asking me where I am. I was out of the house and at Marla's before sunrise and it would make sense for them to worry.

It's not them, though, and Riley instead.

'You were right.'
'Carlos is a fucking asshole.'

Even though I should be happy she's finally seen it, my heart breaks for Riley. Although I've been waiting for her to realize she's making a mistake, a part of me kept hoping I was the one who was mistaken about Carlos. Being wrong would have been better than being right about my friend's heart being broken.

I call Riley but she doesn't answer. Calling Racheal works out when she tells me Riley's with her behind the school building. Skipping my first class because friends are obviously more important than environmental sciences, I make my way to where I know Racheal and Riley are.