26 | i promise you

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When you really think about it, you realise how funny life actually is as a concept. All of us living our own versions of life but how many of us actually want to be here, how many of us have an actual purpose to keep on living?

Jax did. Jax wanted to be here. Jax had a purpose to keep going on every single day. He was a good son, a great brother, an amazing lover, and the best friend anyone could've hoped for. Yet, out of everyone, his death had been written first.

Kylie struggled to come to terms with the fact that her older brother, her inspiration and her only remaining hope had left her. What hurts the most was perhaps the fact that she was the cause. One poor decision she'd made had cost her brother his life and she'd have to live with that mere fact for the rest of her own pathetic life. Except, now there was no reason for her to keep going on, was there?

Elijah was riddled with guilt too. Hours before the funeral had taken place, Kylie had disclosed the shocking events that had occurred before Jax's premature death. He'd been shaken to the core when he'd realise that indeed he had as much blood on his hands as Leon had. As Kylie had.

Jess found herself internally battling with her own thoughts as she sat in that dreaded funeral parlour. She found herself huddling her flat tummy, the thoughts of her miscarriage haunting her. She tried to feel empathy, find the right words to say to Kylie and Valerie but all she could do was bathe in self-pity at the thought of her own lost child.

Somehow it seemed fitting for all three of them to be sitting in a church mourning a death only over a week before Elijah and Jess's wedding was to take place.

The funeral came and went, the day passing in a rapid blur. Valerie and Kylie had thought something simple would be best for the premature death – although it may have been their breaking hearts that had shaped this decision instead.


Only the day before the funeral they'd heard from the police that Leon had been charged with vehicular manslaughter. Two years in prison had been the consequence.

To Kylie's surprise, Leon had mostly kept Kylie's name out of his confession, keeping her secret as Jax once had.

He had admitted that he himself in a jealous craze had been negligent in his driving abilities and this had been the main cause behind Jax's premature death.

Valerie struggled with each passing day to comprehend what had actually happened and Kylie's silence didn't help in piecing the mysterious puzzle back together. Kylie silently dreaded the day her mother would decide that enough was enough and for Kylie to come clean and finally speak the truth.

But so far, Valerie had been nothing but the doting mother to Kylie, keeping her only remaining child as close to her as possible. This was new to Kylie but she relished in the affection that she'd longed to receive as a child, she only wished that Jax would've been on the receiving end rather than her.

Meanwhile, Jess stayed away from Kylie as much as was physically possible. Kylie couldn't understand why – her friend hadn't once come to visit her except during the funeral, and even then she had not uttered a single word of condolence to her friend personally.

---------------

"Mum, it feels weird to be going ahead with this." Jess murmured, lying comfortably on the couch. A tea tree mud mask applied with precision over her slender face by the beautician who was pampering both mother and daughter in preparation for her wedding which was now only six days away.

"Jessica honey, there's always going to be some reason to delay the wedding. Always. But what everyone needs now is some good news, it's what you need. You've been through a terrible ordeal", she spoke tactfully glancing over at her daughters' tummy for a brief second, "hell, you've been through more than just one. Jax's death at your own engagement party, it wasn't only difficult for Kylie and Val, it was difficult for you. You need to start putting yourself first."

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