Bullet Hearted (First draft ver.)

One

It has not been easy, adjusting to the Brazilian lifestyle. Though nothing easy is worthwhile right?

Back home in the states, I knew every neighbor. I had lifelong friends, cousins to help take care of, but now being in Suzano, a municipal of São Paulo, it all stopped. I went from starting conversations, to hoping nobody spoke to me. Knowing all the people around, to knowing not a single person.
In truth, I'm far from fluent in Portuguese. It felt as if every passing person could see, hear, and smell the fact I was certainly not one of them.
And it definitely didn't help that my navigation skills were less than beneficial to me.

"Just get some bags of rice and beans for the week"

All that was said by my host mom, Adriana. Just a quick trip to the market to grab some essentials, no big deal.
Between the streets all designed to be straight shots and houses with their orange roof tiles, I found myself getting lost more times than I'd like to admit. Getting places on foot for some reason found a way to be much more difficult than in car.

Straight..right..left on Alameda Armando Alcântara street

The words repeated in my head. Simple directions to the grocery store, it shouldn't be that hard.
Now was time to see if I had gotten it right. I quickly made up this little game to see if I had gotten the street right. Squinting my eyes, I slowly lifted my head to see- not the right street.
Ripping my phone out of my pocket and wandering around was probably not the wisest thing to do, but regardless I ripped it out from the back denim pocket on my shorts and pulled up the maps app. I was too frustrated to care.

Almost every guide to Brazil said walking around with a phone in hand was just an invitation to be robbed. Despite all this, it was usually what I did anyway.

I kept my eyes on look out for anything familiar. A dog wandering through someone's trash, never ending rows of houses with the same wooden gate in front, and tall buildings surrounding in near distance. Although this time, I noticed two boys sitting under a tree a few houses down. Asking them for directions could help me not only get to the market before it closes, but a good way to practice my Portuguese.

They didn't look too busy, and more approachable than people who were already heading somewhere. I started down the street, carrying myself with the most superficial confidence, hoping my words wouldn't sound too American or my voice too shaky.

"Hello excuse me?" my voice practically shaking as they both stopped talking to blankly look up at me.

"Hi?"

"You know where is the Celso Arão Suzano from here?" I read the name off my phone.

"Oh yeah- if you keep going down the street and take a left- " one of them began, gesturing down right of the street before taking a second to rethink. "is that the one with the flower displays outside?"

"I thought it was on the right?" the boy next to him sitting under the tree questioned, looking up from his phone.

"It's okay I will look for it." I said smiling to them. "Thank you."

Just before they went out of my view, "No no hey we're not doing anything just come with us we'll help you find it." the boy insisted, jolting up. "Guilherme get up come on."

It was the closest feeling to life back home. People always willing to help you, even going out of their way to do so. Neither of them seemed to be sure of where or even what I was talking about but decided to go out of their way to show me. I'd noticed people here were much more outwardly helpful.