Cassie's Reviews (CLOSED FOR CATCH UP)

10: Earthly Appetite || Ouryoaie

Author: Ouryoaie 

Book title: Earthly Appetite

Title

When I first read the title, I thought it was a little strange. But it fits nicely to the story, and it's unique.

Cover

The cover is beautiful. I like the colors and the font, but the phrase under the title isn't legible (at least not when using the web), so maybe bigger letters or a different font could work better. Without having read the story yet, I can see a connection between the title and the cover.

Blurb

The blurb is marvelous. You did a great job introducing the main character, the whereabouts, and the obstacles she must face. It's short, yet concise.

Opening chapter (Chapter 00)

There isn't much information about the character or chain of events that led to this scene. However, I can't help but love your writing style, your descriptions, the way you show her pain, her anguish, her despair. The last line was great; It shows uncertainty or a harbinger of more terrible things.

*I would put this chapter right before [01] – after the schedule.

Plot

Before I start talking (writing) about the plot, I'd like to say that I read all the chapters twice. I was halfway through chapter 3 when I realized that I wasn't taking any notes (I usually am while reading-reviewing) because I was completely enamored with your story and writing. I decided to keep reading. ;)

Your story perked my curiosity, and each chapter had me more and more confused. That can be both a good and a bad thing. I was surprised by the cliffhangers and the action scenes, but I couldn't understand a lot. That scene where Anya looked at herself, hurt on the bed, reminded me of the "If I stay" book/movie. I figured that she was in an in-between world, but the challenges were a nice twist.

I liked the sadistic, know-it-all voice that dictates what's happening in the subconscious. I was confused when you mentioned that number (number of participants). I now understand that they are the people who are still fighting for a second chance. (Please, confirm that I got that right.)

I'm curious as to why they have to pass tests. Haven't they proved their worth during their life? I hope there's a valid reason, and it's not just a medium to reveal what's happening to Anya.

The first chapters were interesting, and I'd like to know more about her past. I have a feeling that her mother is an important link to the story and doctor Emry seemed to know more than she was saying.

To be honest, after the accident, I was wondering where Luke was so when Anya remembered him, I thought "Finally!"

Don't get me wrong. I like your story, but I feel that you are hiding a lot. I don't fully understand her eating habits, what's happening with her shadow, and then, I (the reader) have to deal with a new, unknown world where Anya has to pass some tests to get a second chance. Maybe you could give more details about her life before the accident and show how much this thing/lack of shadow is affecting her.

Characters

I could tell from chapter 1 that Anya has a long, mysterious past. You depicted her struggle well, and it's interesting to see an emotionless character. However, you haven't given any information about her life. I liked how that man in the subconscious recognized her and mentioned what had happened during an event and I liked the references to her mother.

When people started being against her during the second test, Anya had a sudden outburst. I'm not good at reading people but this was surprising. I thought it wasn't her but that thing inside her. Is it eating her emotions? And is it responsible for this explosion?

Anya is a survivor, and the fact that she keeps going on only shows how strong she is despite her situation. I couldn't help but love her strong character (because yes, she is strong even if she might not believe it).

SPaG

There aren't any mistakes (not that I was expecting any).

Overall impression

Your story is weird –in a good way. I'm impressed by your description skills; You are excellent at showing things and emotions (or even the lack of them). I'd love to read more of the story, mainly because I want to understand what's wrong with Anya. When will you post the new chapter?

Good luck with the rest of the story!