This book isn't for younger readers, its more of a book to recognize someone's thoughts this story its a book I was writing years ago but just found may 1 2024 and decided to express some feelings I have been feeling for a bit, Not everyone feels this
10:45 am
its only 10:45 p.m. last time i checked it was 10:44. Time feels like water rushing out of a cup when you put it upside down, at first it will quickly rush out and scatter. Time can make you smile,laugh,and cry, but then there are still water droplets one by one. slowly trying to come out like the rest of it, like the last few minutes, as an awkward pause. an awkward pause is something everyone will dread as if it can hit someone.
Thoughts and feelings feel so sharp at night like its your average day and the sun is out, and it can also feel dizzy, like your mind is clouded with thoughts and feelings that you feel like are no longer yours and they belong to someone else. Your mind can be tricked by this and start to see things that you don't want to see, make you develop a fear of something around you that isn't even there.
And in the morning your restless craving for blackness to hit you, and when you get time to sleep you can't sleep and your thoughts and feelings aren't anything but grayness it can make you overthink, or not think at all, cause others to scream and shout at you for your words that should have been reworded or not said at all, and instead be kept down, locked away like a chest, or prison cell, and others would consider a diary, a diary , however instead of a tone or a voice its your shaky handwriting, possibly even tears go into this instead.
It can make you feel pain for no reason and others will just say your growing but it continues and you don't grow, or itch that goes down your neck and will spread and spread and you itch but you don't feel it, as if your body just goes numb.
And when it does go numb you feel static, you shouldn't feel static your a human not a radio switching stations, or a TV with its cable unplugged, and when this static happens emotions can happen it can make you feel uncomfortable and so unpleasant, or it can give you a tickle and make you laugh and then everyone will look at you like your mad and you belong in some crazy asylum. or perhaps it makes some people feel hollow as if a cloth with a ripped hole that a moth ate through, do you feel these?
Now as you read you say to yourself either two things,
>yes am I predictable? am I just so plain that I look like it? Why can't I have more personality put into myself?Am I the regular basic standards. the common, the common that no one picks, 99 daisies in a field and one poppy, and your the daisy?
Or are you the poppy questioning yourself on why can't you be the normal, why can't you fit in and have some common sense in your self?
Or are do you realize this stuff at all? do you feel these things, sometimes some sleep deprived people at first don't ever realize this stuff and are so happy as a daisy, but few nights of no sleep, they can become so insecure and feel like they are in a mirror maze. forced to look at them self and wonder why can't they be this and that, they can become so obsessive over these why questions when they are human, everyone is a human
